Restless Computer Syndrome

You know those moments where you're bored, but not bored? Where you want something or do something but you don't know what? The point where you want to run around but want to lie there? Yeah I'm in that spot right now.

I've been busy in August. I only wrote 5 entries last month. I guess working two jobs will do that to you. But I'll be finishing Wal-Mart on Thursday. I'll miss some of the people I've met but I won't miss the customers. No offense to people that shop there, I'm one of you, but...wow some people make you want to stab yourself in the eye.

My computer hasn't been well. It's not too bad now, since I've done some scans (thanks to Brad) and took the back off to clean (thanks to Elliot for that one!). I couldn't clean it fully but it seems to have made a difference.

At least now I can multi-task. I couldn't earlier. Now I have Google Chrome, yahoo messenger and Windows Media Player open. Chrome has two tabs. Earlier, I would only be able to open one of those programs at a time, and have only one tab. So hopefully I can keep this all up until I can afford a new laptop. Maybe for Christmas, I'll just ask for money to go towards it so I can get a fancy, top of the line one.

Almost done book two of Song of Ice and Fire. Wow. Just amazing books. I picked up book three today since I knew I'd be finished this one soon. I try to avoid spoilers, but unfortunately I find the occasional one. In my head now, I'm trying to think of how it'll end and...well, I don't see one that doesn't involve a lot of people dead and some of the living still unhappy over the final outcome. It's going to be interesting few books now!

Not sure what else to say at the moment. I'm probably going to try WoW. I was playing earlier but my character kept dying because the computer would lag. Hopefully if I play now it'll be ok. Or use another character that won't get killed easily.

Hopefully once my computer gets over this "flu", I can download new music. I've had some recommendations and I know some of the bands that I listen to have or will have new music out. For now, I'll do with what I have.

I guess that's all for now. Thanks for staying tuned.

Just...Sad

I went to Chapters today. I wanted to pick up Book Two of A Song of Ice and Fire. I'll soon be done the first book and I wanted to get the second one while I still had money. I didn't stay as long as I wanted to. First of all, the battery in my mp3 player was dying and I hate being somewhere without music to listen to. Second of all, during my wandering, I somehow ended up in the Sex and Relationship section. The title of a book made me stop. It was called "It's Not Him. It's You." The second I saw that, the tears welled up and I had to leave, not just that section, but the entire store. I paid for my A Clash of Kings (that's the 2nd book) and left before I started crying.

In my opinion, the jury is still out on if it's the him's in my life or if it's me or if it's some combination of both. Most likely it's the combinations. And I know that I shouldn't but I do miss someone that I shouldn't be missing. I don't think I've seen him in over a month, barely words exchanged since then. But still.

I have very unhealthy relationships.

I'm not sure what it is, but I want to cry but can't.

I see my doctor this week. Hopefully, he'll have news about the psychiatrist.

Small Update

I haven't really posted much this weekend. Not really sure what to say. Other than me getting a job interview for a clothing store. I told them I can work anytime, but if I want to stay where I am, I'll have to tell them to I only want to work in the day. After I start, of course. Besides, working there, I'd get a discount on clothing. They have a lot of teacher friendly clothes there.

Other than that, I just kinda...go through life. I just do what I have to do. That, and lose myself in World of Warcraft. It's easy for me since I don't have to do much thinking, much work. I follow the map to my quests, press buttons, things die and I get a reward. But I have no feeling for it. It just kinda happens.

And I'm reading A Song of Ice and Fire series. You may also know it as A Game of Thrones which is just the first book in the series. I'm not that far into it, but it's good so far. And I've been doing a good job at not reading spoilers.

I guess that's it for now.